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The Four Horsemen of Relationships & The Antidotes…

Pay Attention! Stay Alert! We Need Meaningful Relationships In Our Lives!!!!!

‘2023’

As I was researching to prepare for a new blog post for my dedicated followers & readers of my blog posts, whom I love soo much for your wonderful, heartfelt, motivating comments and feedback!! Kudos to every one of you!!!!

I stumbled on a very interesting article that used a metaphor of 4 horsemen to describe when a relationship is near ending. (The Gothman Institute) A research-based approach to relationships; and since that is what the subject matters in my articles are all about. I figured this would be a good article to analyze and share with my tribe. So here we go, this is the feedback and understanding I gained from studying this article that I want to share with you all, and would love, love, love your feedback. Let’s Get To It!!!

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse is a metaphor depicting the end of times in the New Testament. Only Gothman used this metaphor to describe communication styles that, according to this research, can predict the future of a relationship. The Gottman Institute’s Editorial Team is composed of staff members who contribute to the Institute’s overall message. It is their mission to reach out to individuals, couples, and families in order to help create and maintain greater love and health in relationships. This is My Mission as well (Kendra).

The 4 Horsemen of Relationships: When a Relationship is falling apart, ending, or in an unhealthy state.

  • Criticism – During arguments and disagreements one or the other partner/or both verbally attack personality or character.
  • Contempt – Attacks sense of self with an intent to insult or abuse.
  • Defensiveness – Victimizing yourself to ward off a perceived attack and reverse the blame.
  • Stonewalling – Withdrawing to avoid conflict and convey disapproval, distance, and separation.

I don’t know if you are in a space in your life where you are willing to admit that you have been guilty of each of those stages, let me be the 1st to admit it.. I’m guilty of being in each of those stages at some point in a Relationship not just romantic relationships. (Kendra)

What I have learned in life is that we all deal with the same issues when it comes to relationships one way or another at some point in life; different times, different situations, different people, different personalities, different backgrounds, different belief systems, etc  But what I want to give today is suggestion Solutions that I believed can really make you think before reacting and help you come to a solid decision on whether you decide to stay and work things out or believe it’s best for the both of you to walk away and seek Peace & Happiness.

The 4 Horsemen of Relationships Solutions/Antidotes:

There you go!! I really hope this information helps someone or many. Honestly, I needed this info more than anyone reading it right now! lol.

The past 2 years have been very challenging for me when it comes to relationships, not just romantically but as far as family, friends, co-workers, and yes (even sometimes) my children. I’m finding as life and time go by and, people change, their beliefs and how they view life change and unfortunately, sometimes that changes the dynamics of the relationships you once knew. The results of that are not always positive especially when you have no knowledge, education, or training on how to deal with certain issues and especially if that someone is not willing to communicate with you effectively enough to attempt to make things better…

I leave with you a Golden Nugget that I have decided to live by and stand by…  (Kendra)

“If God up above, the creator, the ruler of the earth, that wants everyone on the planet to serve him, fear him, and put him 1st in your life don’t force you to do so but gives you freely the options to go right or left with him…   Who Am I (Kendra Lashay/ Candy >>>to force people to love me, respect me, and stay in my life? Once I have done my part to stay relevant in your life and I see & feel that the same relevancy is not given back to me…  It’s time to part ways!   Love Yall, Be Good! Most of All — Stay Prayed Up and Blessed Up!!!!!

Kendra Donahue

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